When it comes to theology, Donald Trump’s vice-president clearly knows best. Are we about to see an American break with Rome?

The battle to be the absolute worst Trump henchman can feel so closely fought. But in the end, it’s always JD Vance, isn’t it? You would say Stephen Miller, but Miller’s too hidden to qualify as a front-of-house henchman among the US president’s court of grotesques. Stephen’s clearly been judged so wantonly horrifying that the administration must keep him out of public view. If you enter the store, Miller is the only-for-the-initiated entity alluded to in a whisper by the oleaginous sales assistant. “We do have something in the back – off-the-books, as it were – if sir is after something a little more … specialist.”

But Vance? Vance besets us like the 11th plague – the plague of media appearances. For the next South Park season, I hope the creators give their brilliantly ghastly little vice-president avatar a papal mitre to wear. After all, here we have a man whose pick-me book on his journey to Catholicism has yet to even be published. That tome currently lies in the rectum of HarperCollins, ready to be excreted in June – yet inevitably, Vance is already giving menacing doctrinal advice to the pope as part of the multi-theatre fallout of Operation Epic Facepalm.

Marina Hyde is a Guardian columnist

Though welcomed by chefs and campaigners, many schools say the government’s plan to remove ‘grab and go’ options from the menu is a step too far

It is lunchtime at Richard Challoner school, a Catholic comprehensive for boys in New Malden, south-west London. The familiar smell of school lunch is beginning to waft around the corridors.

In the canteen, there is a moment of calm as the kitchen team make final preparations before year 7 descend – a mass of chatting, laughing boys, with backpacks swinging and empty tummies grumbling.

George Robertson has joined Reform and the Tories in making the case. Look welfare recipients in the face and say that

The benefits budget is now a magic money tree. Whenever Conservatives or Faragists make wild promises – tax cuts, more police, more punishment, more bonuses for marriage – and are asked how they would pay, the answer is always “welfare”. The sums are enormous. “Only the Conservatives will cut welfare spending by £23bn and get Britain working again,” the party insists.

More unexpected was the klaxon from the Labour peer George Robertson this week, demanding a cut in benefits to finance defence. “We cannot defend Britain with an ever-expanding welfare budget,” said the ex-Nato chief, wanting to pluck this juicy plum to fund defence. Good to see him slapped down sharply by the government: there is no “zero-sum game” between these two budgets, said the chancellor’s deputy, James Murray.

Guardian Newsroom: Can Labour come back from the brink?
On Thursday 30 April, join Gaby Hinsliff, Zoe Williams, Polly Toynbee and Rafael Behr as they discuss how much of a threat Labour faces from the Green party and Reform UK – and whether Keir Starmer can survive as leader. Book tickets here or at guardian.live

Polly Toynbee is a Guardian columnist

With prices at the vets soaring by more than 60% since 2016, tests such as MRI scans for dogs can exceed £3,500

Why does my vet charge more than a private hospital for humans? I’ve been quoted £1,500 for an MRI scan for my dog. When I looked at how much it would cost for a person to have the same type of scan privately, it was about £700.

As technology improves, the treatments and diagnostics available for pets are getting closer to what is on offer for human patients. While we used to rely on a vet to assess what was going on inside an animal, they can now recommend hi-tech scans to see exactly what’s happening. But progress costs money.

Trump administration has riled head of Catholic church over use of theology to justify conflict in Iran

The contrast in experience between the two men disagreeing over war and theology was striking.

On the one side was Pope Leo XIV, the first North American to head the Catholic church and the first cleric from the Augustinian order, who this week visited the modern Algerian city where Saint Augustine once lived. For Leo, who wrote his doctoral thesis on Augustine’s ideas, it was the culmination of a lifelong intellectual interest.

Manchester City gained ground last weekend but the league leaders have plenty of reasons to remain positive

By Opta Analyst

Last weekend was nightmarish for Arsenal. They lost at home to Bournemouth on Saturday with a flat, disjointed performance, and matters deteriorated further the following day when Manchester City beat Chelsea convincingly at Stamford Bridge. Arsenal’s lead at the Premier League summit has narrowed from nine points to six, and City still have a game in hand.

The two sides meet at the Etihad on Sunday for a match that could define the title race. The narrative pretty much writes itself: City win that game, then win their game in hand, and the title is surely theirs given how strong they are at the end of the season. That scenario is being talked about as an inevitability in some quarters, as though Arsenal have already let things slip.

PM responds to Guardian revelations that Foreign Office overrode failed security vetting for former minister

• Olly Robbins forced out in Mandelson vetting row

Jones repeatedly denied that the prime minister had given a misleading impression about what has happened and had “lost grip” of the situation. He told BBC Radio 4’s Today programme:

I completely refute the suggestion the PM misled the public or the House of Commons. It’s very clear from his words he was reporting what he had been told and what had been followed.

I don’t think this is a question about the prime minister’s leadership.

The Foreign Office did not tell the prime minister that they granted developed vetting status to Peter Mandelson against the advice of the security and vetting process. The prime minister was only made aware of that on Tuesday evening this week when the documents became available to the Cabinet Office as part of the humble address process (a binding motion to request government papers – JG).

No minister is allowed to see these vetting documents as a matter of principle because we employ security professionals to conduct deeply invasive personal investigations into people’s backgrounds and for those officials to make a recommendation to civil servants on the appointment and employment of individuals.

Exclusive: Adrian Fulford will also examine wider national security vetting system in review commissioned by No 10

• UK politics live – latest updates

A retired high court judge is expected to review Peter Mandelson’s vetting process and the wider national security vetting system.

The review, commissioned by Downing Street, comes after a Guardian investigation revealing that security officials decided Mandelson should not receive developed vetting clearance, but were overruled by the Foreign Office to allow him to become US ambassador.

There has been a steady succession of departures by ministers and senior officials in the past two years

The exit of the top civil servant Olly Robbins from the UK Foreign, Commonwealth and Development Office (FCDO) is the latest departure of an official or minister under Keir Starmer’s two-year tenure as prime minister. Here we take a look at some of the most high-profile resignations since Starmer came to power.

PM ‘furious’ as spokesperson insists Downing Street repeatedly sought facts of the case without being told

• UK politics live – latest updates

Keir Starmer has said it was “unforgivable” that he was not told that Peter Mandelson had failed his security vetting before taking up his role as ambassador to Washington.

The prime minister said he was “furious” about what had happened, as he insisted he had not known that security officials had initially recommended that Mandelson be denied clearance.