Joy is unbounded and when it dies down perhaps the guilty will be held to account for cheating and facilitation: perhaps they won’t. Still, enjoy the moment

Oh dear. Such a shame to see the US lose at football after their insanely embarrassing president cheated for them. Still, it really brought the world together. The last time this many people cheered on a Belgian resistance, it was 1914 and the Germans had just crossed the Meuse. As you’ll be aware, the USA were dumped out of their own World Cup on Monday night by a wholly superior Belgium, after Donald Trump boasted that he’d personally intervened in three phone calls with Fifa president Gianni Infantino to get the red card shown to USA striker Folarin Balogun rescinded. Yes, the US cheats at football. Pass it on.

You’ve heard a lot about shithousery during this tournament. We have even, excruciatingly, seen a few American commentators attempt to use the word in conversation. Guys, please, just – no. It’s not for you. You have ’erbs, “a couple things”, and “a ways to go”. But let’s call the events of the past few days by the name they deserve in all the languages of the world: Whitehousery.

Marina Hyde is a Guardian columnist

Many of the millions who turned out for funeral wanted to show their opposition the killing of their leader, regardless of their broader views of the regime

As the multipurpose, multinational funeral of Iran’s former supreme leader Ali Khamenei moved to the Jamkaran mosque in the holy city of Qom, and then to Najaf in Iraq, Iran’s leadership was weighing the mandate it had been given by the millions who have taken to the streets of Tehran over the past three days.

Some hailed the moment as a referendum from the streets showing support for the clerical establishment, and called for the strategy of confrontation with the west to be intensified. Others said it was more about a wider national pride that was conditional on demands for change and an end to the war being met.

The collision was catastrophic. Jane Ouartsi suffered a fractured collarbone, two spinal fractures, a broken femur that took three operations to fix, and she had to learn to walk again like a baby. Why has no one taken responsibility for her life-changing injuries?

As Jane Ouartsi walked across a pedestrianised square in central London, on a Friday evening in early August three years ago, she linked arms with her partner, Dave Mathias, and told him how much she had enjoyed the afternoon they had spent together, eating pizza in Soho and visiting an art installation. It was the last time she can remember feeling properly happy and relaxed.

“We were walking quite slowly, talking about the art. It’s hard to remember exactly, but I think I was saying what a lovely lunch, and then all of a sudden there was a horrific impact,” she says. “I felt my spine and body split and I thought my life was over.”

From returning comedy award winner Sam Nicoresti to Flo & Joan’s cheeky One Man Musical, these are surefire standouts at the fringe

• Edinburgh festival 2026 reviews

It may contain a brief moment of actual tree-hugging but this bracing solo show by Bryony Kimmings finds fresh and compelling perspectives on the horribly familiar plight of our planet. Season through season, she recounts a year of upheaval after moving to a regenerative permaculture homestead with her son, her partner and his daughter. It’s a thrill to see Kimmings back, in a climate reckoning of both cosmic and quotidian proportions – and a theatrical time capsule of the way we live now. Chris Wiegand Read the review. Traverse, 8-30 August

I joined Marilyn Monroe, Walter White, Ozzy Osbourne and other tribute artists on a cruise where imitation is its own art form

INT. DECK 7, LE CABARET ROUGE, 11.37pm

Frank Sinatra, palming a can of Sprite in one hand and the fist of his beautiful red-headed wife in the other, sat in a dark corner across from Jeff Bezos, who looked like he was waiting for him to say something. But Sinatra said nothing. He’d been mostly quiet all evening, and now in this cabaret he seemed even more distant, staring out past fog and strobe and Bezos’s strong bald head and into the large room where at least half a dozen men had basically shattered a bistro table trying to get a better look at Marilyn Monroe. Sinatra’s wife knew, as did Roy Orbison and Austin Powers, who stood nearby, that it was only minutes before he was supposed to go onstage, and that forcing any sort of conversation on him in this mood of focus would be extremely stupid.

The scientific consensus is that burning fossil fuels drives the climate crisis, yet the world’s biggest oil companies are planning to increase production

As the world swelters in ever more dangerous heat, why are oil companies being allowed to turn up the gas instead of paying for the consequences of their greed?

That ought to be the question on everyone’s minds amid baking heat domes over much of the northern hemisphere, temperature records being smashed day after day, children dying in locked cars, hospitals filling with heatstroke victims and emergency services tackling wildfires.

The Reform UK leader will speak after Labour asked the Electoral Commission to investigate claims that he broke electoral law by not disclosing gifts

Q: Do you think the parliamentary commissioner for standards should investigate Nigel Farage’s gifts from George Cottrell?

Badenoch said that was a matter for the commissioner.

[Farage is] hinting at press regulation. For all of the criticism and the attacks, and I would even say abuse that I’ve got from the press, I’ve never once recommended curbing our free press. I think this is one of the amazing things about this country.

I would be very worried about a Reform government using government power to control the press. I don’t think that that would be right.

A ruling is expected this afternoon on her attempt to overturn a ban on holding elected office.

The opening speeches are now under way in Ankara, and you can watch them below.

This is the Day 1 industry event, not the leaders’ summit, mind you.

Result of court case against Associated Newspapers Limited expected this afternoon

Throughout the High Court claim brought by Prince Harry, Sir Elton John and others, lawyers for the Daily Mail’s publisher denied having obtained any information through unlawful means.

Antony White KC, for Associated Newspapers Limited (ANL), said at the trial’s close that “ordinary, legitimate journalism” was the more likely explanation for how the journalists sourced their stories, instead of phone hacking or other unlawful means.

What is even less likely still… is that if the 40 journalists were all engaged in serious unlawful information gathering, they would have all made witness statements and queued up to come to court to be cross-examined.

Through the course of this litigation, it’s only got worse, not better. I think it’s fundamentally wrong to put all of us through this again when all we wanted was an apology and some accountability.

Hannes Marschalek, who allegedly exposed his penis to four other women in Cambridgeshire, tried via US court martial

A US airman who allegedly exposed himself to a 16-year-old girl and four young women in England was able to avoid the British justice system after the US military was permitted to take control of the case, the Guardian can reveal.

Cambridgeshire police received complaints that the airman, Hannes Marschalek, had indecently exposed himself to the women as they walked past his home in Littleport, a small town in Cambridgeshire, in 2022.